Author: Alvaro Castillo Divorced parents struggle over the holidays to make the season joyous and exciting for their children. 1. Talk to your ex before an event to talk through plans, so you can diminish the enormous pressure children can come under when their parents' relationship changes. 2. Work out dates, times and transportation schedules then share them with your children, after the decisions have been made. Make the schedule between adults, don't put the children in the middle of this negotiation or make them choose. 3. Children are more confident when they have a routine and maintaining some of the holiday traditions can be a way of bridging the past and future. 4. Get Real. Be realistic in your expectations - handmade gifts, homemade holiday cards and simple dinners. Pick traditions that are most important to you, create new ones. 5. Holidays can trigger feelings of grief, loss, and remorse - regardless of who ended the situation. Thoughts

Roberta came to me and complained about her Daughter. Whenever she would visit her, she would feel demeaned and manipulated. I suggested that Roberta set limits and cut back on her lengthy out-of-town visitations with her Daughter. However, her Daughter pleaded with Roberta to stay longer, and the false guilt emerged. Roberta decided to stay for the typical two-week visit and she felt miserable. In typical fashion, her Daughter merely used her as a babysitter for her kids. Roberta was really angry, but it was masked as false guilt. As a child, she was never allowed to express her anger appropriately.

Author: Alvaro Castillo The legend and myth of the Tooth Fairy is a delightful part of our modern family culture. Kids dream about receiving a special gift or money from this charming, magical fairy. Adults fondly remember the Tooth Fairy as a wonderful childhood fantasy of their youth, and they pass on the mystery and charm to their own young children. In most households, the Tooth Fairy operates under cover of darkness, coming to visit after a child loses what are commonly called baby teeth. Parents help perpetuate the fantasy by showing their children how to place the lost tooth under their sleeping pillow or in a special holder or pillow made just for the Tooth Fairy. Then, the Tooth Fairy herself visits during the middle of the night, exchanging the tooth for a gift or monetary reward. The Tooth Fairy is a lovely fantasy, but how exactly did she originate? FAIRIES, FAIRIES EVERYWHERE The beginnings of the Tooth Fairy probably began many centuries ago in a cu

Author: Alvaro Castillo You won't read this in the glossy ads of a pregnancy magazine, but motherhood often leaves women feeling burned out, disappointed at times, and confused about who they are anymore. As a writer on this topic, one of my major conclusions is that it's not our reality that is necessarily so difficult, but rather the gap between our expectations and reality that drives us crazy. What creates this gap? It begins with the romanticization of motherhood, the buildup to the "big day" of childbirth, like the idealization of a wedding as opposed to the reality of a marriage. Mothers-to-be are marketed to like crazy, and I am concerned that high-tech gadgets have a particular role in this problem. The marketing of gadgets raises the bar of expectation even higher, and gadgets tend to promise new parents an unrealistic level of control and certainty. Take the BabyPlus "prenatal education system. " Hey, I guess a regular baby isn't good enough any more. You need